I'm at the end of my 35th year of life. Already. As with most birthdays I am contemplative. I am thinking of what I've accomplished so far. What dreams I have realized. Where have I fallen and bruised myself and where have I healed beautifully. What have I learned? Where am I still growing? What do I still need? Am I the same woman that I was at 25/15...Will I be the same woman at 45/55/65...Who will I be? I am proud of who I am today. I am not perfect but I am happy. As long as I am breathing I will make mistakes; I will have to apologize for something to someone. I will always have the gamut of emotions that the Creator has given us. But as long as I have breath I will be working diligently to be the WOMAN that I was created to be. I will be passion and belief; diligence and sensitivity. I will be strong and yet vulnerable. Irritable and yet happy. I will always be in various stages of development but I will enjoy the journey and will be blessed to have the experience. ~happy birthday to me. thank you Creator for my life~

There are some things and some people that I have allowed to take me to the edge of insanity. I feel it in my neck, in my head, in my womb. I feel it in my throat and even in my breasts. I feel it in my stomach. It makes me feel ill and out of control. I work hard to be balanced and in a safe space but sometimes I allow people to take me to the brink of madness. I need to breathe.

The Fight or Flight Response
Stress can trigger the body’s response to perceived threat or danger, the Fight-or-Flight response. During this reaction, certain hormones like adrenalin and cortisol are released, speeding the heart rate, slowing digestion, shunting blood flow to major muscle groups, and changing various other autonomic nervous functions, giving the body a burst of energy and strength. Originally named for its ability to enable us to physically fight or run away when faced with danger, it’s now activated in situations where neither response is appropriate, like in traffic or during a stressful day at work. When the perceived threat is gone, systems are designed to return to normal function via the relaxation response, but in our times of chronic stress, this often doesn’t happen enough, causing damage to the body.
Stress: How It Affects Your Body, and How You Can Stay Healthier
By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com

Stress management strategy #4: Accept the things you can’t change
Some sources of stress are unavoidable. You can’t prevent or change stressors such as the death of a loved one, a serious illness, or a national recession. In such cases, the best way to cope with stress is to accept things as they are. Acceptance may be difficult, but in the long run, it’s easier than railing against a situation you can’t change.
Don’t try to control the uncontrollable. Many things in life are beyond our control— particularly the behavior of other people. Rather than stressing out over them, focus on the things you can control such as the way you choose to react to problems.
Look for the upside. As the saying goes, “What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.” When facing major challenges, try to look at them as opportunities for personal growth. If your own poor choices contributed to a stressful situation, reflect on them and learn from your mistakes.
Share your feelings. Talk to a trusted friend or make an appointment with a therapist. Expressing what you’re going through can be very cathartic, even if there’s nothing you can do to alter the stressful situation.
Learn to forgive. Accept the fact that we live in an imperfect world and that people make mistakes. Let go of anger and resentments. Free yourself from negative energy by forgiving

It's a blessing from the Creator to be so close to my 36th birthday. 6 more days of celebrating life at 35. I feel good. I have this delicious little boy that I call Yums who will love me forever and who makes me laugh. I have this wonderful big man that remembers I love sundresses and Starbucks and will go get me a slice of key lime pie in the middle of the night..just cause I want it. I have these great sisters who keep me balanced as the middle child. On one end my older sister who is beautiful beyond understanding and so full of life it's hard to describe. On the other end my little sister with the brown beauties for children who is like a real life superhero to me. I have girlfriends that make me laugh; make me cry; allow me to be me; help me to be the woman I crave to be. I have parents that love me unconditionally..despite. I have a home to come to at night. I have a job. I have food to sustain me. I have legs to get me where I'm going. My mind is at rest. I am being loved every day even when I don't know it. I am so grateful to be at this point in my life.

I have a girlfriend that is like Wonder Woman and I find her breathtakingly beautiful. She is the most resilient person I have ever met. She is fearless with super human will power. She is strong. She is loud and boisterous. She dances wherever and whenever she feels like it. She has the biggest heart in the world. She is loving and giving and so full of life. She is an amazing social worker. She is my girlfriend, Trenese. A woman who looks like me who I find beautiful.